Commitment. Such a serious word right? It’s so crucial to have commitment in anything you do. I have been looking back at my life and trying to find where I have been the MOST committed and the very least. I have come to the conclusion that since infancy I have been committed AF to all things that bring me the most JOY and come easily to me. Of course anyone would be committed to “having a good time” but I mean it in the most sincere way that that is ALL I have ever been committed to in my life. Not routine and definitely not responsibilities, that goes for at work and home life. Do I do the things I need to do? Depends. Upkeep my home? Yes and no, it’s a mood, if I’m not feeling it ya girl will not clean. Get ready for the day? Not until midday and it’s a problem, not for me, but anyone who has a problem with me living my best life at a very very very slow pace… hahahaha. #StayAtHomeMomWithFirstChildProbzHeHe (ok that was the first and final hashtag I will ever do … .maybe? Because I think they’re funny to use to say certain obvious things or insiders lol)
Ok but for real, I seem to lack in the area of focus and dedication which is something I really, REALLY want to get a hold of, since that’s seriously the foundation to living a really great life… apparently. If you didn’t know or have known that and still continue to be oblivious (like ya girl) let’s break it down to really get our things (life) in order. I have found that committing to shit is actually draining. By that, I mean, if it isn’t aligned to me and my passion, it becomes an inconvenience and that’s when things have faltered even before actually trying at anything. What I want to do (and you should do too) is really figure out what we can do, what we would like to do, what we most definitely HATE doing and lastly, what we should be doing for real for real but with a twist. The twist being a better attitude and approach to it all, lol.
So first, what can we do? I can do a lot of things 😉 hahaha no but really. We cannot limit ourselves to anything. So we seriously can do anything we need to. I personally, am aware of the simple fact that I don’t have anything initially wrong with me that impedes me to take action, in any way. I personally, am more joyous when I’m grateful. And remember I said we’d do this with a twist? The twist here is that we need to establish a relationship between our internal questioning and our most reciprocated emotion/feeling that we can’t seem to get enough of. So mine is gratitude, think about what yours is for a second. “I am so grateful that I am aware of all the endless possibilities I possess right here in this very moment in regards to what I can and can not do. I am also grateful for the very upsetting fact that there are humans out there that sadly cannot say the same, yet I am here” That last sentence is me acknowledging that sad but true fact so it brings me to not take advantage of my privilege and think about others out in the world who WISH for a potential like mine, everyday. Y’all please read that with NO pretentiousness but god awful truth. I told y’all I’m real and deep and I have to get y’all on my same frequency of gratitude and the only way to do so is for y’all to really think about your position and ability in this lifetime.It really is just a change of perspective to really WAKE US UP from whatever story we have feeding our minds that blocks us from getting up and doing the damn thing (anything, whether that be literally or metaphorically).
Next, what would we like to do? If your answer if “I have no f&$*^#& idea”, you’re not alone lol. If I’m being honest, I know what I would like to do and I know YOU KNOW what you’d like to do. If you say you don’t, that means you haven’t made time for yourself to get to know yourself enough to know what you LIKE?! And that is madness. So go figure it out, give yourself a day (ha! You thought I was going to say 5-10 minutes, huh? SIKE. It takes more than 20 hours to really get to “know” who and what you’re really like on the surface). After you have spent the day with yourself, come back to this blog, it’ll be right here. Okay so what I would like to do (this is me and I want you to get an idea)…is get paid for my abilities and knowledge, upkeep a sustainable lifestyle and make everyday a fulfilling day. That’s what I honestly would like to be able to do. It may seem simple but obviously there’s layers to it all but that’s the gist and for this blog post it’s all we need.
Ok here’s the silly part, what do we most definitely hate doing? Hate is a strong word but I really, really, really don’t like… hehe. So I know I personally don’t like feeling like I’m wasting my time, youth or life… very dramatic, I know, but I’m not even kidding. Building boundaries has really allowed me to be very aware of what I dislike in and around my life. That being said here is a list of my dislikes:
- Feeling incompetent
- Getting taken advantage of (in any aspect)
- Wasting time when there’s better things to do
- Being bored
- Having obstacles in my way
- Nothing productive to do
- Not being given ample time and space for whatever activity I’m interested in and
- Feeling stuck/heavy
With those very real but very true dislikes, I now know I have let the very things I hate actually control my life and now I’m a healthy bit of angry. I’m angry that I know what I hate yet have subconsciously allowed it to fill my time everyday because of lethargy. This is me being 100% real with you all, babes. My soul is living and grateful that I’m a SAHM living with my little guy during my day to day but I’ve been having a bit of MOM GUILT because I’m not stimulating my own mind and I feel that I’m doing a disservice to my son by doing life as I have been… which is not much most days. I feel alone because there’s so many capable mamas out there my age or older that seem to be doing sh!+ like everyday… and I’m like … *merp* with my little sidekick by my side. It’s weird and I;m obviously being dead honest but I know I’m going to snap out of it and that’s what I’ve been giving myself hope for throughout my bad days… but especially my good days when I’m in my groove. Ok this blog post is not to be depressing AF it’s supposed to be uplifting AF for the both of us so… let’s get back to it.
Lastly, what should we be doing for real for real but with a twist? I obviously won’t know what we lot should be doing but I can guess. I’m guessing (i’m really good at guessing lol) that we should be getting up in the mornings. With or without a job and of course with 5-8 hours of rest at least. We should be getting up early so we use our day (all the time any human gets as well) to do anything we want. We should also be spending time outside so we can breathe and not see but feel something cool (yes i’m romantically acknowledging the wind but you would too if you’ve seen A Walk To Remember with Mandy Moore lmao). We also should be thinking every moment of every day. No, not condoning anyone to OVER think and get overwhelmed and give yourself anxiety. No. I mean, just think about what you’re doing… all the time! For instance, you’re making brekky for your child right. You get the eggs, bacon, heat up the skillet and get some bread and jelly… As I get the eggs, I think “yum! I’m about to make some great eggs for me and my little” and then you get the bacon “damn… like I know this is high in cholesterol but I’m going to split one strip with my little so I can have it all in life and… it’s not the end of the world lol” (yes I don’t now about you lot but I really do talk to myself like this haha). And then heating up my skillet I’m like “wow I’m so grateful to my gf for showing me how to season my skillet and use it correctly AND also telling me that if I cook with it everyday I am intaking my iron for the day… so fu*$&*# cool…” and so on and so on… BTW this is TOTALLY thinking and you need to do more of it. Why? Because you’ll start to gain consciousness of your everyday life and actions as well as see (as an observer of your own life) what you’re up to and why you’re the way you are. So the twist of the simple yet EFFECTIVE advice I am giving to us is that we need to think and act differently. Starting right now. We need to find a safer and caring perspective rather than an abusive and horrible one. No more judging ourselves or being our biggest critics. It’s seriously not fair at all. To us or our immediate world around us.
With allatttttttt being said, we got this. Let’s commit to ourselves AND each other <3 We deserve it. We will prevail whatever TF we’re going through and… We’re winners. We’re fuc$*#( winners my loves, THAT I know <33333333333333
Thank you all for being here and joining me. I love you lot and I also need to SHOW and prove to you that I do by showing up as my best self but actually just showing TF up. It’s August 1st 2023, there’s a beautiful full moon out and I’m just putting out to the amazing All-That-Is or multiverse or God/Goddess that I AM HERE and I will go on!!!!!!
Little cute manifestation ritual I do which has proven time and time again to work is the burning paper method. I will share how I do mine because it’s *EXTRA AF* but obviously that’s WHY it’s so powerful!
I will make a promise to you but that’s only for my email subscribers 😉 so make sure to plug in and join my ever-so personal newsletter!!!!! xxx
